I've Changed My Mind

Over the past year, well, really two years, I've been under going a caterpillar like transformation.

I've become an adult. Like, a real one. Having children, buying a house, being married-the whole package. Um, reverse that order.

I've also learned that I've got incredible power and strength. I've found out that I'm an amazing person. I'm not saying this to sound arrogant or proud, I'm saying this because it's true of all of us!

I noticed during the beginning parts of being a mom, when all those sleepless nights seemed to drag on for weeks, months and even years, that I just kind of was lost.

I felt at times, I wanted to be joyful, but found myself being hateful and jealous instead.

I would see photos of other people on family vacations on Facebook, and as much as I wanted to be happy for them, I just sat there and was just so jealous!

Jealous is an evil thing. No good comes from it. I am a big runner, so let me put this analogy into a form that I can relate.

When I found myself in jealous feelings and thought, I realized that, for me, it was like running circles around a track. The two mile, or even the one mile run around the track, just kind of sucked for me. 

The two mile was always the first even at our track meets. This event always seemed to be the one no one cared about, and honestly, I always kind of felt like someone was just kind of laughing at me as I would pass them and do laps.

Just like a track, running circles in a hamster wheel gets you no where.

Jealous is a lot like that-you keep circling around and around and around. You keep seeing the same things and keep feeling the same things and it never gets better. You're in the unloved event. Sometimes it seems like it's the most pointless two miles ever. 

Every once in a while, you'd have a friend try and cheer you on for a few laps, but they never really stayed for the whole course. I can't say I blame them. It gets old.

So does feeling and thinking jealously.

I've learned on those days, when I was running around the jealousy track, that Bitterness and Hate would always show up to be my only cheerleaders. The Enemy at his finest. You know, when that's who you have cheering you on, you find that you will run yourself into the ground. When you cross the finish line and turn back to look at them, they're both just standing there clapping their hands, laughing at you. See it doesn't bother Bitterness or Hate. In fact, they loved it! They knew the longer you circled around that track and them, the worse off you'd feel when you finally stopped, and they knew exactly how you'd affect everyone else in your life because of it.

They're really sneaky. 

I was absolutely tired of letting something so small and insignificant steal my joy. Besides, there will always be someone who has a "nicer" house, "better" car, "more talent," and so on and so forth.

Besides stealing my joy about life, I noticed that I was poisoning my relationships around me. I wasn't being thankful for the amazing job my God does at providing for us. I wasn't thankful to husband for all his hard work, that he does every day.

I needed to start transforming my mind! I found Dr. Caroline Leaf's program-The 21 Day Brain Detox. Wow! I watched this video on her first, and I was just floored. She explains amazing scientific discoveries in a very simple way!

The toxic thoughts we have in our brains, like jealousy, hate and all the rest of the negative junk, affect our brains AND bodies in a negative way! But, we as amazing, God created beings, can actually change the way we think!! We are not victims about how our brain thinks, WE CONTROL OUR BRAINS! Not the other way around.

I thought, "This is exactly what I need!" I started this program two months ago and I have absolutely noticed a huge difference!

I have been able to completely kill of those thoughts of jealousy. I have noticed that I am so much happier for EVERYONE! Including myself.

I can see people that get a new home and think, "That's just so awesome for them! They totally needed it!"

Someone else gets a new job I can easily say, "I'm so thankful that God blessed them and they have something so wonderful!" And most importantly, I sincerely mean all of those things. I can say it with a heart filled smile. It isn't generic. It is genuine.

Day by day, with her program I totally started to see myself killing all these nasty things.

Again, using a running analogy, I ran cross country as well. With feelings and thoughts of Jealousy, it was like running two miles around a circle track. You never went anywhere. You just finished and felt tired and exhausted and just "Eh."

But, after starting and finishing this program, I noticed that it was a lot like a cross country race. I may have run two miles, but I got to see so many cool things along the way. 

Beautiful possibilities of countryside.

Sometimes, when I was running, I would find myself so amazed at the landscape that it was hard not to be drawn to the beauty of the countryside. Or laugh at a cow that you'd just passed by!

In cross country races you'd find yourself running up and downhills, around buildings, going here there every where! Kind of like a Dr. Seuss book. I remembered when I finished the race I had such a sense of accomplishment and it was always fun to see all the different people cheering you on! No one got bored watching you run circles, no-your friends would run to keep up with you! They'd race around the track to keep cheering you on.

When you were done, you were smiles. You knew where you started and you knew exactly how far you'd gone. 

That's what this program does. It takes you on a journey-it helps you conquer your hills and it cheers you on along the way. I makes you enjoy the journey and discover things along the way that make you realize how awesome and how much power you really have!

Additionally, you help to change the people around you. When you start to become a non-jealous person, filled with positive thoughts, you attract more people to you. People who want that feeling too!

I'm already almost done with my second toxic thought and I can't wait to just keep continuing my positive journey! Life doesn't seem to be the rat race it once was. I have an incredible sense of peace now. Joy. God has truly blessed me and my family! I have fully started to appreciate all his Glory and Wonder for our lives and those around us! What an amazing thing to feel.

If you are struggling with these same types of thoughts, try this program! I promise you, you will see the difference in your life!!!  This might be one of those things that I need to "giveaway," on my blog, because this is really what my life and journey on here has been all about.

Be the change that needs to happen. Be the change for someone else. Let's help each other!

Have you had thoughts that you've struggled with that just affect your whole life? Your relationships? Do you ever just feel tired of thinking and feeling that way? 

I'd love to hear your stories or comments. Have you heard of her program and tried it?

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We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV)


Please feel free to check out some of my other posts!


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