I've Changed My Mind

Over the past year, well, really two years, I've been under going a caterpillar like transformation.

I've become an adult. Like, a real one. Having children, buying a house, being married-the whole package. Um, reverse that order.

I've also learned that I've got incredible power and strength. I've found out that I'm an amazing person. I'm not saying this to sound arrogant or proud, I'm saying this because it's true of all of us!

I noticed during the beginning parts of being a mom, when all those sleepless nights seemed to drag on for weeks, months and even years, that I just kind of was lost.

I felt at times, I wanted to be joyful, but found myself being hateful and jealous instead.

I would see photos of other people on family vacations on Facebook, and as much as I wanted to be happy for them, I just sat there and was just so jealous!

Jealous is an evil thing. No good comes from it. I am a big runner, so let me put this analogy into a form that I can relate.

When I found myself in jealous feelings and thought, I realized that, for me, it was like running circles around a track. The two mile, or even the one mile run around the track, just kind of sucked for me. 

The two mile was always the first even at our track meets. This event always seemed to be the one no one cared about, and honestly, I always kind of felt like someone was just kind of laughing at me as I would pass them and do laps.

Just like a track, running circles in a hamster wheel gets you no where.

Jealous is a lot like that-you keep circling around and around and around. You keep seeing the same things and keep feeling the same things and it never gets better. You're in the unloved event. Sometimes it seems like it's the most pointless two miles ever. 

Every once in a while, you'd have a friend try and cheer you on for a few laps, but they never really stayed for the whole course. I can't say I blame them. It gets old.

So does feeling and thinking jealously.

I've learned on those days, when I was running around the jealousy track, that Bitterness and Hate would always show up to be my only cheerleaders. The Enemy at his finest. You know, when that's who you have cheering you on, you find that you will run yourself into the ground. When you cross the finish line and turn back to look at them, they're both just standing there clapping their hands, laughing at you. See it doesn't bother Bitterness or Hate. In fact, they loved it! They knew the longer you circled around that track and them, the worse off you'd feel when you finally stopped, and they knew exactly how you'd affect everyone else in your life because of it.

They're really sneaky. 

I was absolutely tired of letting something so small and insignificant steal my joy. Besides, there will always be someone who has a "nicer" house, "better" car, "more talent," and so on and so forth.

Besides stealing my joy about life, I noticed that I was poisoning my relationships around me. I wasn't being thankful for the amazing job my God does at providing for us. I wasn't thankful to husband for all his hard work, that he does every day.

I needed to start transforming my mind! I found Dr. Caroline Leaf's program-The 21 Day Brain Detox. Wow! I watched this video on her first, and I was just floored. She explains amazing scientific discoveries in a very simple way!

The toxic thoughts we have in our brains, like jealousy, hate and all the rest of the negative junk, affect our brains AND bodies in a negative way! But, we as amazing, God created beings, can actually change the way we think!! We are not victims about how our brain thinks, WE CONTROL OUR BRAINS! Not the other way around.

I thought, "This is exactly what I need!" I started this program two months ago and I have absolutely noticed a huge difference!

I have been able to completely kill of those thoughts of jealousy. I have noticed that I am so much happier for EVERYONE! Including myself.

I can see people that get a new home and think, "That's just so awesome for them! They totally needed it!"

Someone else gets a new job I can easily say, "I'm so thankful that God blessed them and they have something so wonderful!" And most importantly, I sincerely mean all of those things. I can say it with a heart filled smile. It isn't generic. It is genuine.

Day by day, with her program I totally started to see myself killing all these nasty things.

Again, using a running analogy, I ran cross country as well. With feelings and thoughts of Jealousy, it was like running two miles around a circle track. You never went anywhere. You just finished and felt tired and exhausted and just "Eh."

But, after starting and finishing this program, I noticed that it was a lot like a cross country race. I may have run two miles, but I got to see so many cool things along the way. 

Beautiful possibilities of countryside.

Sometimes, when I was running, I would find myself so amazed at the landscape that it was hard not to be drawn to the beauty of the countryside. Or laugh at a cow that you'd just passed by!

In cross country races you'd find yourself running up and downhills, around buildings, going here there every where! Kind of like a Dr. Seuss book. I remembered when I finished the race I had such a sense of accomplishment and it was always fun to see all the different people cheering you on! No one got bored watching you run circles, no-your friends would run to keep up with you! They'd race around the track to keep cheering you on.

When you were done, you were smiles. You knew where you started and you knew exactly how far you'd gone. 

That's what this program does. It takes you on a journey-it helps you conquer your hills and it cheers you on along the way. I makes you enjoy the journey and discover things along the way that make you realize how awesome and how much power you really have!

Additionally, you help to change the people around you. When you start to become a non-jealous person, filled with positive thoughts, you attract more people to you. People who want that feeling too!

I'm already almost done with my second toxic thought and I can't wait to just keep continuing my positive journey! Life doesn't seem to be the rat race it once was. I have an incredible sense of peace now. Joy. God has truly blessed me and my family! I have fully started to appreciate all his Glory and Wonder for our lives and those around us! What an amazing thing to feel.

If you are struggling with these same types of thoughts, try this program! I promise you, you will see the difference in your life!!!  This might be one of those things that I need to "giveaway," on my blog, because this is really what my life and journey on here has been all about.

Be the change that needs to happen. Be the change for someone else. Let's help each other!

Have you had thoughts that you've struggled with that just affect your whole life? Your relationships? Do you ever just feel tired of thinking and feeling that way? 

I'd love to hear your stories or comments. Have you heard of her program and tried it?

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You should!


We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.
2 Corinthians 10:5 (NIV)


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Sensitivity Issues...We're Not Talking Feelings, but Clothing

When we had our first child, our son, who is now three and half, we were so blessed with all these really fun outfits!

Who doesn't enjoy dressing up their little children in handsome attire? I think it's one of the best perks to being a mom. (Why is it, little girls clothes are way cuter than anything I can find for myself?!)

Around the time he turned one, we started to notice that he seemed to strongly dislike a lot of things about clothing. In fact, pretty much the minute he figured out how to take his clothes off, they were ALWAYS OFF!

Getting him to wear pants...FORGET IT! Long  sleeved shirts were nothing short of a full blow tantrum of elephantine proportions.

I honestly, started to worry if there was something wrong. 

When he started to finally speak words, we started to find out a little bit more as to what was bothering him, or HOW it was bothering him.

Hats were a joke. A coat would only be worn if he actually found out it was cold outside, but couldn't be combined with a long sleeve shirt. AND it had to be a specific kind of coat and was only allowed with a T-Shirt. Socks, forget about it. They were too tight, to high, to turned, to something.

Every time we went to have photos taken, it was nothing short of a battle royal. I wanted a cute Christmas Photo with a sweater, he screamed and cried himself to sleep.

It is just heart breaking and frustrating as a parent to deal with this. Frustrating because you have spent time and money on buying clothes to keep them warm and protected, and heart breaking because you can't seem to make it better or go away.

I spoke with his doctor about it and she said that it is a Sensitivity Issue. She said usually, this is something that stems from one parent. Guess who that parent is.....ME!

He totally takes after me. Although, I'm not sure mine was like his or not, I did do a lot of the same things. (Except maybe cry myself to sleep or scream bloody murder.)

Long sleeved shirts and a winter coat, were a NO GO!

I lived in t-shirts. IF I wore a long sleeve shirt, I HAD to have a t-shirt or tank top under it. 

I despised socks and underwear. My mom and dad used to check me before I left for school to make sure I was wearing both, but shortly after I would get to school (and it was the most uncomfortable walk to school ever!), I would run to the bathroom and quickly remove both!

My cousin still laughs to this day about how I would always stuff my underwear and socks in places. It's pretty funny looking back on it.

While I've out grown my aversion to a few of these things, my sensitivities are still there. Jeans-have to fit specifically. Shirts, need to be long and kind of thin. I do wear a lot of tank tops under long sleeves. Socks, unless I'm working in snow, need only be ankle socks (but NOT go above them!).

Now as an adult, it is a lot easier for me, because I can control my clothing and style. I don't throw a tantrum or cry. I'm not sure when or why the change came about.

With my son, I realize, that I need patience. That things will eventually get better. I definitely PICK my battles with him...like we absolutely HAVE to wear pants to leave the house.

But, I'm ok with the no socks and no underwear. I'm ok with the t-shirts and tank tops, and I'm ok with having to buy the same coat over and over and over again every year in a bigger size (as long as they are still making them at GAP).

I'm ok with hunting for stretchy pants and not jeans. You pick your battles, and realize that some day, they won't be there.

Did I mention hair cuts are awful?! We just did our last one at home, last night. He has spots that aren't quite right and honestly, after the crying and fighting, I'm ok with paying someone else to do it. Mom can only do so much on her own.

I know we aren't the only ones that deal with these types of sensitivities and I'm thankful that its my son and not my daughter, that has these. 

She is his opposite. She loves shoes, clothes and accessories. She likes being a princess and wearing fun stuff! At least one of my children will let me dress them.

For all you other parents out there who are struggling with this you're not alone. I pray that it will get better for you as well as your children get older. Mine seemed to get less severe as I got older. Kind of like how I would NEVER eat broccoli, then one day when I was in my tweens, I tried it and discovered I LOVED it! 

Do what you can to make it comfortable for them. 

I've started giving him options of clothes. We let him pick out his clothes and put them in his own drawer, so he can control the combination of them. He has a few different pairs of shoes, and again, he controls and picks out which ones he wears. It's not always easy. In fact, when the seasonal change from summer to winter happens, it's just a struggle to switch to bigger, more covering clothes. 

When you find something that works, like a pair of pants, BUY LOTS! In bigger sizes! Same thing with shoes. They grow so fast and hunting for the same stuff, once it's out of season is a nightmare!

We have already seen a lot of improvements with him, but we know that by the Grace of God, we will all get through this. He is, his creator after all, and He doesn't make anything that isn't perfect in his eyes.

I know there are a lot of people that give me strange looks when I try to explain to them that he doesn't like to wear socks. Or, that long sleeves are a hard sell. I've even had people tell me that you just have to force them to do it. They clearly have no idea how big a struggle this is, or how traumatizing it can be. I just get the general idea, that they really have no clue as to what they're talking about.

I just smile and kind of pretend I didn't hear them. Sometimes it's just a little easier that way.

I'm not sure how many of you understand what I'm talking about, but I know there will be some of you who do.

So, I'll settle for t-shirts in family photos and stretchy pants. It's really what captures who he is anyway. My son. I wouldn't want him any other way. He is Perfect!

How have you coped with this? Know anyone else who struggles with kids with sensitivity issues? Ideas? I'd love to hear input.

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"You are altogether beautiful, my love; there is no flaw in you."
Song of Solomon 4:7 (ESV)

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my souls knows it very well."
Psalm 139:13-14 (ESV)






Visit my other posts:

Friendship, the New Dating Game

Domestic Play Passport for KIDS! 

Keeping your Mouth in Check with Your Heart

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The Great Pumpkin Hunt!

Happy Birthday,

 Peanuts Gang!

If you don't know, today marked the 62nd birthday of the Peanuts Gang. They were first published on this day, October 2, 1950. If this hadn't happened, I'm not sure who my children would love so dearly! Thank you, Charles M. Schulz!

In honor, of the Peanuts Gang, and October, I decided to have a little fun with my kids.

I held a "Great Pumpkin Hunt!"

The Pumpkin Clues

I used pumpkin foam and wrote out little scavenger hunt clues. I, of course, was going to help them solve this. But I wanted to include the five senses for the clues. 

For one of the clues, I made my own "sniff." I just put some double sided tape on the pumpkin and put a little cinnamon spice on it. Easy as can be!

Clue, with home made, sniff!

We started off in the house! First clue was handed out, read, and we thought it out together.

The Pumpkin Clue was, "Where is Snoopy's Doghouse?"

The answer-outside! So out the door we went!

The second pumpkin was right outside the door. (Sight)

The Pumpkin Clue "What do trees have that fall down?"

Answer-leaves!

After looking around all the trees, we found the third clue, under some fallen leaves (touch).

The Pumpkin Clue, "What do you do for trick or treat? (*Hint* At the door)"

Answer-ring the door bell and say, "Trick or Treat!"

 On our way up to the door, we found

THE GREAT PUMPKIN!

The Great Pumpkin

But, there was also another Pumpkin Clue to be found at The Great Pumpkin.

The Pumpkin Clue, "Where do we keep something that smells like this (cinnamon)?" (Smell)

Answer-in the house!

We stopped to "pretend" trick or treat, and ring the door bell (hearing) to finish out the third clue. (This also helps get us prepared for trick or treating for real this year! Check out what my kids will be this year for Halloween!)

When we came inside, we found a little birthday party for Snoopy and the Gang! (I'm always up for a little imaginary justification for chocolate cake, on a Tuesday.)

This also finishes out the use of the five senses-taste! Chocolate Cake!

Happy 62nd Birthday, Gang!

We had a lovely afternoon using our senses hunting for the Great Pumpkin! Hope you can do this too! 

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“Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”                                                    1 Timothy 4:12                                            

                          

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